Love Poem
Original Poem:
[i carry your heart with me(i carry it in]
i carry your heart with me(i carry it in
my heart)i am never without it(anywhere
i go you go, my dear; and whatever is done
by only me is your doing, my darling)
i fear
no fate(for you are my fate, my sweet)i want
no world(for beautiful you are my world, my true)
and it’s you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you
here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows
higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that’s keeping the stars apart
i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)
Rewritten Poem:
[i carry your love inside me(i carry it in]
i carry your love inside me(i carry it in
my heart)i am never without it(anywhere
i go they see you, my dear; and whatever it is i do
is only that of your guidance, my darling)
i fear
no fate(for you are my fate, my sweet)i want
in the same world(for you are my world, my true)
and it’s you no matter what happens to me
and whatever happens, the sun that always sing is you
here is the deepest secret nobody tells you
(the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; grows
higher than soul can hope or mind can hide)
and while this fear is keeping us apart
i carry your love inside me(i carry it in my heart)
The reason I chose to rewrite the poem in this way is because the original poem talked about the lover, but the underlying message in him keeping them in his heart was their love. It was her love that he was keeping and inspired him to keep going. Which is why I chose to rewrite it to talk about her love. I tried to encapsulate him moving through the world but keeping her love and her morals at the forefront of his life. This is why I said that “i am never without it(anywhere i go they see you, my dear; and whatever it is i do is only that of your guidance, my darling)”. I wanted to show that as he is living his life, he always reflects back and asks himself what would she do. As he interacts with other people , his actions reflect her so they would be seeing who she was. The second part of the poem, I felt like he feared that he wasn’t worthy enough to be in the same “world” as her which I’m assuming is heaven because it seems like she’s not in the “living” world anymore. But even through the uncertainty of whether or not he’ll make it to this other world, he still has hope because he has her love inside of him.
